Let’s face it, there is nothing more important to Moms than raising happy, healthy kids.
Every thought they think, every decision they make and every action they take, ultimately considers the well being of their child and for most that means...EXHAUSTION, FRUSTRATION AND OVERWHELM, are bound to pop up at some point...that is...UNLESS THEY HAVE THE RIGHT RESOURCES!
What might Mom want?
For Mother’s Day it’s tempting to reward mom with pretty flowers, breakfast in bed, an arts & crafts project thoughtfully made by the children or even a day out for some pampering with a massage or a facial. As a mom of five children, believe me, I love all of these things and am grateful to have received most of them over my 16 years as a mom.
It was several years ago, that everything changed. In this moment, everything I wanted changed and I would have given anything to just know that my child was at peace within himself.
My 12 year old son had been struggling in school for several years. I was draining every ounce of energy I had on a weekly basis to communicate with the school, sit with him while attempting to do his homework, attend therapy and doctors appointments and searching desperately for answers that I couldn’t find.
The more I did, the worse he got, not only in school but spiraling into depression. Shortly after his 13th birthday, he couldn’t take it anymore and opened up to a practitioner that I was forcing him to see on a weekly basis (because after all, I am his mom and I wanted what was best for him...so I HAD TO HELP!) that he had attempted suicide the night before. THESE ARE SOME OF THE WORST WORDS A PARENT CAN HEAR! As I sat in the room with the two of them and he recounted the details of the night before, I sat there in shock and horror wondering what I had done wrong, yet more grateful than I had ever been in my life to have my son sitting there across from me.
It was in that moment that I realized their had to be a better answer. The strategies I was using were not working! I had been forcing him to be something he was not ready to be. I was not giving him any chance to make decisions for himself. I thought I knew what was best for him, which I know now is impossible, because I am not him!
It was a long challenging road from that day, with many tears and exhausting hours of finding him the help that he was open to receiving and even having to allow him to walk away for a perioe of time to find himself, separate from me. I believe that I learned more from this one experience than from any other time in my 41 years of life. So I pass these lessons on to you today in hopes that you can truly internalize them and apply them to your own life without having to face a dire situation like I did.
Several Life Lessons...
- Each child is on their own journey in this life and it is our responsibility as a parent to let THEM discover what that is.
- As parents we do not know what is best for our children simply because we have life experience. We are not them and it is our responsibility to guide them to discover what is best for themselves while ensuring their safety.
- Often times this process of discovery means that the child will not conform to what you or society thinks they should become and that is okay! Those who have had the greatest impact in our world, do not conform to society. We need independent thinkers to evolve!
- Good grades and stellar athletic performance are NOT more important than a child’s happiness. We must step aside from our own EGO that wants to have top performing children and love and honor our children for WHO THEY ARE, NOT WHAT WE WANT THEM TO BE.
- Children need the FREEDOM to make choices with natural consequences.
That means we must learn to give our children logical choices to make on their own rather than making demands or enabling poor behavior.
What Mom Needs...
This year for Mother’s Day, every mom can receive the tool kit that she needs navigate the often rough waters of parenting with ease and flow. Imagine turning what seems like sailing in the ocean in the middle of a hurricane to a relaxing afternoon sailing on the lake in with clear skies and brilliant sunshine.
My journey led me to a beautiful opportunity to become part of Tranquility where we make tools available to all families (and requires no payment) to create a customer portal. With our Certified Parenting Guides and tools, we help you navigate through any situation where you need help.
What better way to honor MOM this year, than with flowers, crafts and breakfast, with a side of TRANQUILITY!
Register for your customer portal here: Get Tranquility